I used to think I needed to win the war against the fear of speaking in public – to stomp fear into the ground, kick its ass! Actual experience reveals that being friendly with fear is so much more empowering, long-lasting and super-duper kick-ass!
Toastmasters has been a huge help in providing a place to practice public speaking, receive feedback and feel safe in making all kinds of crazy mistakes. The fear of making a mistake, looking stupid, forgetting a line is all softened and overcome with experience.
Getting up and actually speaking is the BEST way to become friendly with the fear of public speaking. Yeah, you gotta get wet to get in the pool, and you gotta get in the pool to get wet. You can only swim by swimming. You can only speak by speaking.